4 Ways I Overcome Insecurities Brought On by Social Media

I didn’t really have a how to style idea for the look in this post, but what I mentally went through as I was going through these photos inspired me to share how I overcome insecurities brought on by social media. I must preface this by saying I’m good with myself as I am from my kinky natural hair to my topographically blessed body, to my novicely painted toe nails. However, there are days when a combination of bad day and social media has me super critical of myself and suddenly I’m not the hot stuff I usually know I am. So today I’ll be sharing some of the ways I combat the little thoughts and insecurities that try to creep in and hinder my creative process of content creation and socializing on social media.

A lot of the times when I post a photo I log off right after I’ve posted it. I busy myself with real life things that need to be done like helping my son with his homework, or cleaning the mess I made in my closet while getting ready that morning. I do this to avoid a scrolling-binge where I scroll through other people’s IGs and fall into the self-comparison trap. The only time I go back on is to respond to comments under my own photos.

One really efficient way to overcome insecurities is to post things that you’re critical inner voice is telling you not too. For me this often happens when I go back to edit photos that I’ve just taken. As I play around with brightness, contrasts, and saturation, I often pick up on things that tell me no that one isn’t good enough. Whether it’s a back roll or my belly being more pronounced than  I intended it too, I always find something to be extra critical about. As yall can see in these photos my shapewear failed me, and you can clearly see my belly. My 1st thought was to just retouch the crap out of them, but that would only be a lie. A lie to y’all, a contradiction to the “love yourself as you are” message that I want to be received, and it would feed that insecurity rather than challenge it. So my favorite thing to say to myself and to others that find themselves debating whether or not tap share on a  photo is to “post it anyways.

 

Instead of focusing on the growth and status of others ( I get caught up in this too), I try to focus on my own stats and growth. I set a weekly goal however solid or open to do better than the previous week. From page views and subscribers on my blog to impressions on IG I redirect my energy into identifying what works for me and what doesn’t.  Everybody is doing their thing in their own lane, and it’s important to focus on your lane, your angle, your green grass.

Often times I feel an overwhelming pressure to look a certain way, to lose some pounds, and to “do something with my natural hair”. Then I have to realize that these things are what make me ME. These are the parts of me that I want normalized and that people that look like me identify with. The people don’t need another hourglass shaped plus size blogger with a long Brazilian. There’s not enough plus size women doing this with kinky textured hair that they sport on a regular. They’re out there, but more often than not their hair is under a wig, weave, or other protective style. My why is to create content surrounding plus size style and natural hair all while normalizing the image of and serving as representation for the ladies that look like me. While my look may not garner the same stats as someone in a boydcon, heels, and a malaysian deep wave, I’m still serving my purpose.

So there you have it! There are so many other ways that I navigate social media while keeping my mental health in check, but these four are what really help overcome insecurities that come up.